Monday, October 8, 2012

And I Simply Decided to be Happy Again

I was just thinking today about my decision to be happy.

My husband had passed away and I was determined that I would be one of those widows who always wore black and had the air of dignified, brokenhearted sadness about her.

Really, I was never going to smile again. Then the Big Guy would know just how much I loved him and missed him. So would the world.

Ahhh… how noble it would be to go through life and never again experience joy because of my loss.

A plastic grocery bag blew across the street in front of me and I started crying. It was pretty pathetic.

Then one day, I caught myself smiling and laughing at something.

I cried all over again, because really, was I supposed to be happy?

I decided then that this sad life was not the life I wanted. I didn't want to be a martyr. I wanted joy again. I wanted my kids to see me laughing. I wanted them to be happy.

And so I decided to be happy.

It wasn't an automatic switch.

It still took time.

I still cried when I answered the phone and someone asked for my husband.

I still cried at night when I said my prayers.

But the decision was there and happiness followed.

I am so glad that I made that decision. My big guy would have wanted me happy. 


  1. Hi,
    My name is Cheryl and I love your website and this page especially. I too have "Simply Decided To Be Happy Again".
    I have recently,5 months now,(Wow!, I did it!) have become single after 21 years of emotional and physical abuse.
    I have found your pages very inspirational, from the organizing, home improvements, and just neat thoughts. I am re-doing my home, it is "out with the old and in with the new". I am a different person than I have been these past years. Still dealing with the ex as far as trying to "win" me back again. I am not bitter, nor do I hate him, I actually feel sorry for him. I do want him to be happy, but it won't be with me. I wish him the best and hope that he soon figures out that he needs to move on, than, maybe I won't fear going home at night, or being constantly on edge. I will have whatever is necessary to protect myself in my home, but reality is, I can't protect myself 24/7, as I do have a wonderful job at a Veterinary Hospital, I too, like your friend, adore animals, especially dogs. My dog Lexi is my best friend and has helped me in so many ways deal with all the emotions that come with this life change, but never the emotion of regret. I am blessed that I believe in a God that protects me and loves me through everything. I am not a partyier, I am very much a homebody, so I just want to feel safe in my own home, with my best friend, Lexi :).
    So, in saying all that, don't really know why I shared all of that with you, I guess you make me feel comfortable, and I don't even know you.
    I would like your "Simply DTBH" somehow done in an oil painting, 8x10 maybe, same colors, so cool that those will be the new accent colors in my living room, and mounted on a cast iron easel set beside my TV to remind me that I have done it, I am finally happy. Would you mind if I reproduced this? And if not, how would I go about doing this project.
    It's kind of funny, I don't have a lot of ideas of how my new rooms will be as of yet, but I do know that I want that saying mounted where I and everyone who enters my home will see it.
    Thanks for lending your time and ear and I hope to hear from you soon, even if just to say Hi and let me know how your life is going.
    God Bless You and hope you have a good evening.
    Cheryl and Lexi :)

  2. Oh....This is Cheryl again, my email address is:, if you would ever like to email me. Thanks, once again
    Hugs to you and yours

    1. I am so sorry....I had no idea these comments were here! Cherly, the picture above is not mine. I found it on Pinterest (no link attached) and posted it here. Wish I could point you in the right direction on it. Might be neat to paint your own, though? Somehow seems like that could be symbolic of all you have gone through. I wish you the best in your new life and hope you keep finding happiness. ~ Erin

  3. I would like to ask you to share a link to other resources that have data about this subject of course if you know some.

  4. Hi FriskyBrainiac, were you referring to the subject of being a widow or the subject of finding happiness again?