When You Think Things are Bad, Focus on Blessings

I've been feeling sorry for myself lately. 

You know, when you get sick and feel awful, 

then suddenly everything gets to you....that kind of sorry.

I've been grouchy.

Cuss words grouchy.

It hasn't been a pretty sight.

I feel like I'm being pulled in a dozen different directions. 

I'm a full time nursing student, a single mom, the only driver in the household, and so, so tired...

I remember when I first became a widow, 

I got through the days by thinking of all the people that had things worse than I did.

It probably wasn't the most positive way to deal, 

but it helped me to feel grateful for my circumstances, such as they were. 

It worked then.

I needed a dose of that today.

I got it tonight, in reverse.

My 15 year old daughter said her prayers with me.

It was a good, healthy reminder of what I have that's going right...and it put things in perspective.

I have so many blessings, and I have been focusing on the negative 

to the point that I have dismissed the positive.

It was a bit humbling to realize.

I cried.

In the grand scheme of things, our families are what are important.

The things we teach our children are important.

The time we spend with them is important.

And our attitudes are important...

Here's hoping that we all can see things just a little bit differently. 

With gratitude.

And I Simply Decided to be Happy Again

I was just thinking today about my decision to be happy.

My husband had passed away and I was determined that I would be one of those widows who always wore black and had the air of dignified, brokenhearted sadness about her.

Really, I was never going to smile again. Then the Big Guy would know just how much I loved him and missed him. So would the world.

Ahhh… how noble it would be to go through life and never again experience joy because of my loss.

A plastic grocery bag blew across the street in front of me and I started crying. It was pretty pathetic.

Then one day, I caught myself smiling and laughing at something.

I cried all over again, because really, was I supposed to be happy?

I decided then that this sad life was not the life I wanted. I didn't want to be a martyr. I wanted joy again. I wanted my kids to see me laughing. I wanted them to be happy.

And so I decided to be happy.

It wasn't an automatic switch.

It still took time.

I still cried when I answered the phone and someone asked for my husband.

I still cried at night when I said my prayers.

But the decision was there and happiness followed.

I am so glad that I made that decision. My big guy would have wanted me happy. 

Toilet Paper from Heaven

Sometimes blessings come from the most unlikely places.

I had an experience several years ago that will stay with me. It confirmed to me that our Heavenly Father hears us, He know our needs, and He will help us.

Once upon a time, I was sick as a dog. I couldn't do anything. It was bad. My husband had died the previous year and not one of my six kids was old enough to drive. And then the worst happened. We were on our last roll of toilet paper.

Source unknown

Low and behold, at about 11 PM that night, my boys got all excited and came running into my room. "Mom! Someone TP'd our house!" 

My reply? "Oh, thank you Heavenly Father for answering prayers! Boys, go roll it up. We're gonna make it. "

We have a big tree in our yard. Those kids didn't skimp, let me tell you. They used rolls and rolls and they must not have been pros because they left several of those rolls only half used. And it was the good stuff. I felt spoiled.

Lessons learned?

• Heavenly Father answers prayers.
• He has a sense of humor. Really.
• Blessings can come from unlikely sources.
• Sometime you have to look for those blessings in the gifts that are given.
• What you do today may be the answer to somebody's prayer.
• May we give of our best! =]